teach. pray. - Love is not lost in my classroom

Mrs. Granger, I'm so thankful I had you as a teacher but I felt like you were a friend. You influenced my life a lot. Bless you.

On July 20, I received the above message on IG from a student I taught last year. He has kept in touch with me all summer via social media. I pray he never forgets how much love I have for all of my students. I pray he'll hear my voice in his middle school head when he's faced with challenging choices. 

Thank you so much for helping my little girl not only see her potential but you helped her reach her potential.

A few days ago, I received the above message in an email from a previous student's parent. What that parent doesn't know is her little girl helped me see and reach my potential as a teacher, and her little girl helped me be a better human. I remember talking with her daughter on the playground the last day of school. This sweet girl asked me if I was ever going to be a mom. I responded, "Maybe, one day. If God wants me to be a mom, I guess I will be." She responded, "Well, that kid would be the luckiest kid in the world." My heart exploded. At that moment, I decided maybe I do want to be a mom one day.

I love how you care about your students and go above and beyond.

That sentence was written in a birthday card a student and his aunt gave me. I loved her nephew's desire to learn and his quickness to accept a challenge. Since he always went above and beyond, I was inspired to follow.

Thank you for helping students who can't read, write, talk, and the ones who are autistic. You are one of the greatest teachers of all time.

A student, whom I taught for four years, wrote that in a Christmas card. This particular child is evidence that perseverance, understanding, and love are transformational tools. She is evidence that the tallest mountains can be conquered. 

I share these sentiments with you not to flaunt myself as a teacher but to share with you the difference all teachers can make in the world. The catch is-it's up to the teacher to choose to make the difference. And, if you are the teacher who no longer chooses to make that difference, it's time to search your heart for the passion that got you started & figure out what changes you need to make. Or, maybe it's time to step out of the classroom. And, trust me, I say this from experience. Eight years as an elementary resource teacher had me ready to run out of the profession screaming. But, fate stepped in and took me on a different path, and I'm so glad I trusted it.

Last year, my primary goal as a classroom teacher was to foster a loving and safe environment in which honest and trusting relationships would grow. I knew without the relationships everything else would be impossible. However, in order to do that, I had to be me. I had to be transparent. I had to be honest so my students would trust me enough to engage and learn with me. Notice I said learn with me and not from me. I may have been the adult in the room and even the disciplinarian of the classroom, but I tried really hard to make my students feel like they had a voice in what was happening to them and around them. I was intentional in helping them feel respected as human beings. After all, I believe we must give respect to gain it. There was never a day that went by that I didn't learn from the students in my classroom. And, I hope they learned from me each day. 

Hold up, I know they learned from me; I just got their state tests scores, and they showed out. 

Now, the state and the federal government may look at those test scores and call me a failing teacher. But, I really don't care. I saw their hard work and effort. I saw the tears they shed when they disappointed themselves and when they thought they disappointed me. I saw where they started. I stood beside them in the trenches of battle and in the light of glory. I heard their cries when the world around them preached hate and violence and irresponsibility. I saw their hearts soften when the world around them preached love and kindness and integrity. I was there when they read two and three grade levels behind and could barely write a sentence. And, I was there when they gleamed with pride because they were approaching grade level or even exceeded it. I heard their voices crackle and change, and I heard their bellies full of laughter. I was there with tears in my eyes when they sang with conviction:

A million dreams are keeping me awake 

I think of what the world could be

A vision of the one I see 

A million dreams is all it's gonna take

A million dreams for the world we're gonna make.

For the first in all my years of teaching, last school year gave me hope for our world's future. For the first time in all my years of teaching, I came home on the last day of school slightly sad it was all over. For the first time in all my years of teaching, I felt truly fulfilled. For the first time in all my years of teaching, I felt like I was doing what God put me here to do. For the first time in all my years of teaching, I had the drive, motivation, and energy to think about and do school-related work over the summer. For the first time in all my years of teaching, I can not wait to do it all over again with a new group of kids who will be MY kids.

You know, teaching is the hardest job in the world. And, teachers don't always get the credit or respect they deserve but sometimes they do. Regardless, love will never be lost in my classroom.